POEM: Barren

barren

It is a sorrow beyond grief

That a womb can also be a tomb

To think I’ve carried you around

After all these years

A stillborn foetus

The graveyard in my belly

Though you’ve continued to

Live and live

What a foolish mother I’ve been

To never cease

Cradling this corpse

Just to take after Earth

And be another mother

Was my only ambition

But my womb was closed up

Obstructed by diamonds

My amniotic fluid had congealed

And my umbilical cord

A noose

It was never intended to be

I still feel

The pain in my kidneys

That frozen wellspring of tears

Just beginning to thaw

You felt desolate

As though the forces of the universe

Had let you down

I howled, I screamed, I wailed,

I sang the Shaman’s song

And frantically chanted

All the scripture I could remember

But you were inconsolable

And the pain seems never-ending

An ocean of agonized experience

I must filter through

This fragile being

Until I am finally able

To move on

I don’t know if you can comprehend

What it is that I’m going through

But this shipwreck

Will rise to the surface

Before the aeon is through

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